Tommy Cooper  'I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost three days already.'
My computer goes down on me more often than my girlfriend. - Robert Paul
Plato-Love is a serious mental disease.
tell your boss what you really think about him and the truth will
Oscar Wilde   Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
 Mother Teresa-We cannot all do great things, but we can do small things with great love.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Life is half spent before we know what it is.
Is man one of God's blunders? Or is God one of man's blunders?
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.
Don't take life too seriously. You'll never get out of it alive.
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